Delivering the Nostalrius Petition, My Meeting with Mike

What a strange road its been for legacy WoW servers. On April 15, I joined the Nostalrius movement to bring back vanilla servers for WoW. The petition was already at 100k signatures, and I promised that if it reached 200k signatures that I would personally send it to Mike Morhaime.

I never imagined that you guys would blow past 200k signatures in just a week, leaving me with a promise to fulfill. Well, yesterday, nearly six weeks later, I’m proud to have delivered on that promise, bringing a gigantic three boxes worth of signatures and comments to Blizzard HQ and directly to Mike Morhaime, the CEO of Blizzard Entertainment and my former boss.

Watch the video for more info and check out the pics from my visit.

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  1. Corsah says:

    With a delay this long on your blog post, I was hoping for a little more. Works of parody are exempt from non-disclosure agreements, right?

    Megan: The Executives take shills like a Hunter tames a pet. Are you a shill Grummz?
    [Mark shakes his head]
    Megan: Then don’t negotiate like a shill.
    [Mark hesitates, then flips his shirt down to cover his navel]
    Megan: Very good Grummz! Out there he is the Co-Founder, but in this room, he bargains with you.
    Mark Kern: I… I don’t think this is the Blizzard way.
    Megan: If he wanted the Blizzard way, why will he meet you?

    Mark Kern: Where are they? Where are my servers?

    Mark Kern: Releases, Patches, Leashes, Nerfs, Changes they’re all just phases in a cycle. This one happens, then that one happens and on and on it goes alienating those who play the game.
    Sarahlyn Smith: It’s a beautiful dream, stopping the cycle. You’re not the first person who’s ever dreamt it.
    Mark Kern: I’m not going to stop the cycle, I’m going to break the cycle.

    [Co-Founder Morhaime admires Mark’s shirt]
    Mark Kern: Do not touch me. I am Mark Blizzardborn of the House Kern.
    [Co-Founder Morhaime forgets Mark’s shirt and steps backward]
    Mark Kern: The First of His Name, the TerraFired, Team Leader of Vanilla, King of the Firefallen and the League for Gamers, Grummz of the Great Navel Tweets, Provider of the Petition, Bringer of Games and Father of Legacy.
    [pause. Then Co-Founder Morhaime bursts out laughing, and so are his companions. He flicks Mark’s navel]
    Co-Founder Morhaime: You are nobody, the millionth of your name, King of Nothing, shill of Co-Founder Morhaime. Tonight I will lie to you, and if the Board of Directors is kind, you will get a Pristine realm. Do you understand?
    Mark Kern: [defiantly] I will not lie to you. And I will hear no words of current content, from you, or anyone else. Not until the servers boot in the West, and shutdown in the East.

  2. Corsah says:

    I would’ve prefered to write this scene with J. Allen Brack or others instead, but fortunately I don’t know which individuals are responsible for some of the modern features.

    [standing before the Paper Throne]
    Lord Morhaime: Two hundred and sixty thousand signatures, taken from the hands of Azeroth’s forgotten adventurers. Written after the sudden fall of Nostalrius the Unsanctioned.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: There aren’t seven thousand pages. There aren’t even six thousand. I’ve counted.
    Lord Morhaime: Heh. I’m sure you have. Ugly paper thing.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: It has a certain appeal.
    Lord Morhaime: The Patchwerk of causes. Shame you had to settle for your second choice.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: Early days, my friend. It is flattering really, you feeling shuch dread at the the prospect of us getting what we want.
    Lord Morhaime: Thwarting you has never been my primary ambition, I promise you. Although, who likes to see our subscribers quit time and again.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: You’re so right. For instance, when your cross-realms and group finders removed any player accountability, if I’m going to be honest, I did feel an unmistakable sense of sadness there. But your garrison feature, the one you claimed would be player housing, the one you swore to improve… it didn’t bring players any enjoyment, and that didn’t bring me any enjoyment. It was a bad investment on your part. Luckily, I have friends who want to play something familiar. Something difficult. And they were so grateful to me for providing you their request.
    Lord Morhaime: I did what I did for the good of the game.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: The game. Do you know what the current game is? It’s the thousand quality of life improvements, a series of changes you agree to make over and over, until you forget that it’s a lie.
    Lord Morhaime: But what do we have left, once we abandon the lie? Challenge? An inconvenient nuisance waiting to scare away all subscribers.
    Mark ‘Grummz’ Kern: Challenge isn’t a nuisance. Challenge is content. Many who try to progress fail and get to try again. The grinding strengthens them. And some, are given a chance to progress. They refuse, they stay for the quests or the battlegrounds or friendships. Illusions. Only the content is real. The grind is all there is.

  3. Corsah says:

    Couldn’t seem to post on League for Gamers.

    Can’t say I can design a competitive Legacy shirt design for Blizzcon, but I’d like to see two features.
    1. A blue shirt. Blue gear meant something back then! You even mentioned a company term for bleeding blue. (Besides, there are enough black/white t-shirts in the world.)
    2. This novelty tag attached:

    • Mark Kern says:

      Thank you. Someone mentioned the line “Sometimes Vanilla really IS the best flavor” and I could maybe work on a design for you guys and let you buy shirts as cheaply as I can make them for Blizcon.

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